We have a real treat for you this week, readers! The Old Saw Mill plays host to the Surrey Seniors Cricket Association who are keeping the game alive for over-50s, over 60s and over 70s cricketers. 

THE FINE ART OF OVER 60'S CRICKET

Firstly let's be honest this really doesn't exist, art is replaced by graft. I have broken it down into the disciplines we are all used to:

Fielding - No bowler expects any of his fellow players to be able to run, stop or catch, anything better than this is a bonus, even when the ball is moving straight in the direction of the fielder, many have found cunning new ways to avoid the rolling cherry.  One thing for sure is that when Derek Rushforth is out in the field, if he moves then its either the end of the over or its tea.

Slip fielding is a speciality, in my five years I can count on the fingers of one hand the number of catches taken in that zone. Even when the "slip cordon" is in place it is generally occupied by the least able to move in the field, sedentary or dendritic (tree like) I think is the term.

Boundary fielding - can anybody throw in the ball from the boundary?  Almost without exception the answer is no, though the younger under 65's do have a good go. It can lead to some batsmen underestimating the throw in and run outs do occur, so beware anybody sent lurking to the outer limits, he may just have a decent throw. The long boundary is also difficult as there have been many occasions where the fielder has dropped down to his knees to cover a ball, only to find he can’t get up again without assistance from St Johns Ambulance.

Skiers - Well I've seen them taken but with eyesight generally not what it was, there tends to be a clamour to move away from the steepler, rather than towards it. 

Batting - Now generally the batter has the advantage. Those who have played the game for 50 years or more still tend to have an eye for it and happily pick up any of the amply supplied  loose bowling. With the field well spread its often the case of choosing where to hit, especially

Turning the singles into two's - Not difficult, if you can still run it is highly unlikely that the quick single is going to be stopped. Some prefer to try to relive their youth by hitting the ball very hard for 4 or 6, which is sensible as it negates the need to “run”.

Bowling - Very few bowlers really get beyond military medium and even the young tyros up from the Over 50's are quicker but have limited radar with wides, the great love of most umpires, often outscoring the top bat.  

“Dibbly-dobblies” rule OK - the canny bowler will use the setting sun to toss up a pie or two right into it, the art of wicket taking.  The double teapot is the preserve of the front line bowler as another catch is grounded or a four trickles to the boundary, pursued by an outfielder who appears all of a sudden to have hit quicksand.

Keeping wicket - Now unsurprisingly the chirpy gobshite behind the stumps is still an integral part of the team. Usually rebuilt from other used cricketers (new knees, hips and with fingers at right angle to where they should be), they are still full of it, but often their lost dexterity lets them down. They are never short of poor quality one liner jokes about Godfrey Evans and "Who are you, Chris Tavare?", but still have the competitiveness to harangue both the batsman and the bowler!

The Showers - there is no greater moment in the day sharing a hot shower falling over your team mates genitals as they drag along the floor. Let’s face it, the phrase "I don't know what it was but it needed ironing" also comes to mind and is made for Over 60's cricket. Please let's get the showers back for the 2021 season, they are entertaining in their own right.

The Bar - With 50+ years of experience there is always the guy who "never buys a round" - years of round avoidance has taught that man to produce a masterclass in not standing his corner, waiting to see who is mug enough to go up first to buy. A book could be written on that alone I'm sure. "Anybody got any change", "The missus only gave me a tenner, so I'll have to buy next time", " I've bloody left it in the changing room/car", "Can I pay by card, I've got no cash"

Injuries - They are a constant, everybody has a shoulder, a groin, a hip, a knee, but week in and week out we all still turn up for more pain. Many is the time when the injury seems terminal but when asked for availability next week, the retort is always, "yep and can you put me up the order a bit"

Let's face it, you have to be a bit extreme to want to carry on playing cricket at this age, it's an eccentric’s paradise and long may it continue to be so. The camaraderie is brilliant, a cross between Dads Army and the Women's Institute. Each team has a Captain Mainwaring, a Wilson, a "we're all doomed"and an ARP Warden Hodges even a Sergeant Walker and many have the movement of Arnold Ridley , but there is certainly no Pikes and quite rightly too. Still it's really great fun and if the 60's is great just wait ‘til the Over 70's beckons….

The Surrey Seniors will be making regular appearances at The Old Saw Mill during the Summer - usually on Tuesday or Thursday afternoons, so if anyone fancies watching some gentle cricket played in serene surroundings by gentlemen of a certain age, please contact us and we’ll let you know when there are some games on, COVID permitting!

The Surrey Senior Cricketers Association founded in 2004 is the official body, formally approved by Surrey County Cricket Club and Surrey Cricket Foundation, for the running of Senior Cricket in Surrey.

Joining SSCA is a great way to continue your love of the game and to meet old friends and adversaries from past encounters.

It supports a number of social events, Dinners, Racing Days, Golf Days and Tours abroad. If you would like to know more please visit the website: https://surreyseniorca.play-cricket.com/home